Quiet weekend, EMDR

T broke this small cat (cheetah or jaguar) sculpture by knocking it down from a chest when I didn't give him a full breakfast. M will glue them.

M is gone to the Hamptons this weekend. I decided to spend this quiet time "studying" <The body keeps the score>. I've been 1/5 into the book and have highlighted numerous parts but what's really fascinating is how much I already know! I learned so much by myself as well as in psychology and neuroscience classes at Hunter. Growing up with an abusively critical father, I had managed to figure out my own coping and protective mechanism as a child and adolescent. Now I see that journaling was my way of staying sane. Writing about traumatic events helped detach myself from them and process them rationally. I also remember feeling like I was getting therapy in class because what's taught explained a lot of my past and present mental states. The sense of healing and learning simultaneously was incredibly soothing. Reading this book also offers consolation, validation and hope that I can be happier.

 

One thing from the book that especially got me curious is a technique called EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing). It's developed by Dr. Shapiro, and has been proven to be effective to treat trauma but nobody knows for sure why it works. She accidentally discovered that when she moved her eyes right and left, back and forth while thinking about her terrible experience, the intensity of the trauma decreased significantly. People think the eye movement might be related to the REM sleep phase, which consolidates and process memories. Once I get to the part of the book where it recommends different techniques, I may try to self-administer EMDR. For now, I read info on this website: https://www.emdr.com/what-is-emdr/  (They claim that only certified clinicians can properly provide this treatment.)